Remember when you were young and playing with friends and a situation came up where there was tension and fear? Maybe you were double-daring one another to do something. Typically, someone said, “You go first!” Going first takes courage.
The drive for perfection in raising something as mercurial as a child is, as Brene Brown put it, “seductive and dangerous.” Parenting is an emotional wrestling match between love, expectations, fear, hope, frustration, doubt, comparison (what is her child doing?) and self-worth (which depends on the success of my child!)